


As Long As I’m Here

by volleyowlets



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Acephobia, Asexual Character, Canon Compliant, Coming Out, First Meetings, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-12
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:02:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22682920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/volleyowlets/pseuds/volleyowlets
Summary: His last attempt at dating had left him broken, swearing to himself that he wouldn’t date again. It was better to be alone than constantly beaten down for something you can’t control.“Hi there, what can I get for ya?”If only he could keep convincing himself of that.
Relationships: Daishou Suguru/Terushima Yuuji
Comments: 8
Kudos: 136





	As Long As I’m Here

_ Shit, shit, shit, shit. No.  _

Daishou groaned staring at his, now lifeless, computer screen. His entire days work, all those documents, gone and needing to be completed again if he wanted to get his pay check. He supposed he’d be working all night on his laptop now.

He glanced out the window behind him, the storm raging outside the cause of his pain. 

“Stupid storm,” he grumbled, standing up and stretching his arms out above him. 

“Might as well go home.” 

He frowned as he packed his bag.  _ Why _ hadn’t the company had back up generators installed. Just  _ why. _ They were a large accounting firm for heaven's sake, surely they didn’t think this would never happen. 

Making his way out of the office floor, he knew he had been one of the only people left in the building. Most people had already left when the storm started, preferring to make it home to their families than stay at work for what could have potentially been the entire night. 

Too bad Daishou didn’t have anyone to go home to. 

It was a thought that made his chest ache. Not that he necessarily wanted or needed someone to go home to, he just thought it would be nice to have someone worry about him when he didn’t arrive home, or even just to say hi to in the evening. 

There was once upon a time that he’d thought Mika would be that person, the one he’d be able to go home to every night and that they’d live happily ever after. It hadn’t worked out like that. They made it through high school, they even managed the first couple of months of university together, but then Mika had asked if he wanted to have sex with her.

And he couldn’t. 

It was important to him that she understood that it wasn’t her that was the problem. He’d explained asexuality to her in the hopes that maybe she’d understand. He’d tried to make her understand when the topic came up again. Ultimately, it had driven a wedge between them though, one that they couldn’t recover from. 

That had been years ago though, and since then he’d tried to date other people, but none of them understood why he just wouldn’t sleep with them. Why he  _ couldn’t  _ sleep with them. 

His last attempt at dating had left him broken, swearing to himself that he wouldn’t date again. It was better to be alone than constantly beaten down for something you can’t control.

The rain was cold on his face when he stepped out of the building, hurrying toward the train station. Of course, he had forgotten to get his umbrella from his desk. Of course. 

He didn’t want to run back for it though, he just wanted to get home, maybe make himself a nice cup of tea before he had to crunch numbers for the rest of the evening. 

He was halfway home when his stomach rumbled, earning himself a strange look from the high school girl standing next to him on the train. His body really couldn’t do anything in halves. It was all or nothing. 

With rain landing on the back of his neck, he was nearing a cafe-bakery when his stomach rumbled again, the smell of fresh bread making his mouth water. Perhaps he could just take a peek inside. He didn’t need to buy anything. 

He hurried through the door, making sure it was closed safely behind him, before following his nose to the display case at the counter.

The baked goods smelt even better inside, but the shapes and designs of them, they were nothing like what he’d ever seen. Some were shaped like teddy bears, others mimicked characters from pop culture. He could easily spot cookies shaped and iced like cats, some cupcakes that looked like they were owls sitting in trees, there was even a large birthday cake with what seemed to be a snake winding up the length of a tree trunk, ready to take a nap on a branch. 

They were _ beautiful. _

“Hi there, what can I get for ya?” A voice asked from the counter, making Daishou jump. 

“Uh, can I just get a coffee and a croissant?” He said, finally looking at the man when he moved to stand at the register. 

The man was gorgeous if he did say so himself. He pulled off the tousled blond hair look well, and those arms - those arms could strangle him and he would probably enjoy it. And was that a tongue piercing? Oh he’s talking. 

Daishou blinked twice, breaking himself from the odd stupor he’d been in. He didn’t need distractions like that. 

The blond man seemed amused, a smug expression that told Daishou he knew exactly what he’d been thinking. Right, he was paying. How much was it again? 

“You know, I don’t usually offer, but you’re welcome to take a photo of me if you’re going to keep staring,” the man grinned. 

Daishou quirked his lip up, eyebrows raising slightly at the same time. 

“Oh? I was just wondering why they let someone like you out of the circus and into a bakery,” he sneered. 

He had to hand it to the blond when he didn’t even bat an eye, simply grinned wider and took the handful of coins Daishou offered him. 

“Well, if you really don’t want to stare at my handsome face any longer, you may sit and I’ll bring your food and drink out soon. For the record though, I am the baker and owner of this place so I sure hope they let me in,” he finished with a wink. 

Daishou wished his heart didn’t feel like it was trying to escape the safe confines of his chest. He didn’t have time to battle his own attraction to unobtainable people, not tonight. He had too much work to do. 

He sat down at a table next to the window, taking out his laptop. If he was going to be eating in the building, he may as well get some of his work done. Perhaps he’d be able to get some sleep in if he finished early enough. 

He was opening the first document he had to run the accounts for when the blond man came over to him, coffee in one hand, and a nicely plated croissant in the other. 

“Man, I don’t know how anyone can drink coffee this late in the afternoon. Don’t you just feel hyped up and unable to sleep?” He said when he put the items down. 

“Yes. That’s the idea. Now I have a lot to do, so if you don’t mind,” Daishou made a gesture telling the man to leave. 

“Don’t overwork yourself, it’s not good for you. Make sure you’re getting a good night of sleep too.” 

He narrowed his eyes at the baker. 

“I didn’t come here to be told how to live my life. Let me work,” he trailed off. He didn’t know the man's name to finish his sentence with the impact he’d hoped for. 

“Terushima Yuuji. Baking extraordinaire, and your future. So what would your name be?” 

Daishou blinked in surprise. His what? This man thought he was going to give in that easy? 

“Come on, times tickin’,” Terushima sang. 

“Daishou. Daishou Suguru.” 

“Pleasure to meet you,” the blond grinned. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to leave you to your work. You should definitely text the number on your plate though. Promise I don’t bite. Much.”

Daishou rolled his eyes before turning back to his work. Talk about weird. 

It was nearing 9pm when he finished up and walked the last block to his apartment. Daishou had held onto the piece of paper next to his croissant that had Terushima’s phone number on it. 

He still wasn’t sure if he wanted to use it.

The blond man had come back over to his table a couple of times, intent on making sure that Daishou wasn’t working himself down. The second he’d noticed that Daishou was slowing down, he told him to stop working for the night and go home to get some rest. 

Thinking about it, Daishou is sure he’d been extra rude to the man at that point, stress and exhaustion levels rising that longer he sat there. But looking around, Terushima had obviously nearly finished cleaning up for the night, which meant that Daishou had been there last close, and he hadn’t been kicked out. 

He’d apologised as he ran out, not catching what Terushima had called after him, though glancing back, the blond was smiling at him. 

He sighed, kicking his shoes off in the entryway. 

Home sweet home. 

Going about his evening routine, he couldn’t shake the thought of those warm honey-brown eyes on him. The way that they seemed to want to do nothing more than get to know him. 

Sliding into bed, he found himself staring at his newest contact. Should he send a message? The blond would only have given it to him if he’d really wanted to get to know him, right? 

He locked his phone, putting it on charge before closing his eyes. He’d have to sleep on it. 

Daishou woke up in a cold sweat. 

Of course, he’d had that same nightmare he had all those years ago. The one that he’d had when he and Mika had broken up. The one the he had managed to convince himself he would never be accepted as he was. 

He hit the home button on his phone. 5am. 

He wasn’t surprised that his body clock woke him up early, it happened all the time when he was stressed or lonely. It was with that thought that he sent a quick message to Terushima, thanking him for his kindness the previous evening. 

He didn’t expect an almost  _ instantaneous _ response though. 

_ It wasn’t a problem! You’re always welcome back ;)  _

He rolled his eyes, pulling himself off the bed to stretch his muscles. He may as well head into the office early, maybe he could finish up his work earlier. God that would be a dream. 

His commute was uneventful, and the first thing he saw upon entering the office was the mountain of paper on his desk. Obviously his boss thought he could get through it.  _ It’s going to be a long day,  _ he thought, sitting down and booting the computer up. 

He was right. It was a long day. Somehow, his boss managed to find even more work for him to do, though he was sure that it was just because she didn’t want to do it herself. 

All in all, by 5pm he was ready to crawl into bed, and never return. His only saving grace was that he’d finally reached the weekend and could do just that if he so desired. 

He was walking back past the bakery when the urge to wander in for something to eat hit him. Except he knew he wasn’t hungry, that deep down he knew his brain just wanted to see Terushima again. 

He sighed, giving in to the desire. Was there any point in fighting it? The seed of hope had been planted by his message that very morning. 

As soon as he opened the door, he heard him. 

“Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in,” Terushima’s voice echoed off the walls of the empty establishment. 

Daishou started at the pastries in the window. He really didn’t feel like any of them. Why had he come in? Why had he given in to his stupid wish to see a beautiful man in person again? 

“Or,” Terushima spoke again. “You could wait half an hour for me to close up, and then I could take you out for an actual dinner?” 

Daishou felt his face warm slightly. 

“What makes you think I would want to do that?” 

“Well, nothing. But I would like to take you out, so why not?” 

Daishou couldn’t stop himself from sending a murderous glare to the blond man. 

“And if I don’t want to?” 

“Then I’ll never ask again.” 

Daishou watched Terushima pretend to zip his mouth shut, turn a fake key in lock and throw it over his shoulder. It was a funny sight if he was honest. But he kept a straight face. 

Terushima smiled at him. How could he say no to that?

“Fine,” he said, making sure to sit down in as dramatic a fashion as possible. “I’ll wait right here. Half an hour.” 

The look of pure joy on Terushima’s face as he started packing chairs up made him wonder if this really was a good idea. Dating hadn’t gone well for him in the past, and he didn’t know what the blond man's intentions really were, no matter how kind he seemed. 

_ It’s too late now,  _ he thought.  _ You’ll just have to see where this goes now.  _

He took a deep breath, letting it out slowly with his eyes closed. He could hear Terushima moving closer toward him, nearly finished with the tables and chairs.  _ Soon, Soon _ they’d be going to dinner. 

Terushima seemed to slow down slightly as he finished up. He flipped the sign on the door to read closed before opening the till to count his earnings for the day. 

And all through it, Daishou remained silent, examining the man who wanted to take him on a date. 

“Shall we?” Terushima said, gesturing to the door as he came out of the back of the store. “I’ve been dying to try the yakitori place down the street. You okay with that?”

Daishou huffed through his nose. 

“As long as you’re paying. That place is expensive.” 

Terushima laughed, a proper belly laugh, and god was it beautiful. If this date went well, Daishou might just need to have a stern word with his own heart about getting too attached. 

“Of course. I did ask you out, what kind of a gentleman would I be if I didn’t?” The blond said with a wink. “So tell me, what is it you do for work? You were so intent on making sure I didn’t annoy you yesterday that I didn’t actually get to ask.” 

“I’m an accountant. It’s not very exciting.” 

“That's plenty exciting! I would definitely recommend not taking work home though. You’ll burn yourself out!” 

Terushima was smiling the entire time he spoke. Didn’t his cheeks hurt? 

“As opposed to you shutting up shop just so you could get a date?” Daishou said, rolling his eyes. “Don’t lecture me about work.” 

The blond raised an eyebrow in amusement. 

“I actually closed late yesterday. A beautiful man walked in and at that moment I decided I would stay open as long as he wanted to be in my humble bakery. I did have to start packing up at eight though. One can only function on so few hours of sleep.” 

Daishou knew his face was red, he could feel his cheeks burning. 

“Why didn’t you just kick me out then?” He asked. 

“I told you. Beautiful man, humble baker, anything in the quest for romance.”

He snorted at the dramatic voice the man used in his explanation, quickly covering his face with a hand. God he hated when he snorted, it was so ugly. Everyone had told him so. 

“See? Beautiful.” 

Terushima smiled at him, slowing down in front of the restaurant that they’d finally reached. Daishou could feel himself smiling back. 

Their date continued well into the night. 

Daishou found out that Terushima owned the bakery with his best friend, Bobata Kazuma, and that they both worked five days a week, with Terushima as their main baker. On the days Terushima didn’t work, his old classmate baked all the items in the store, though the blond said that they earned less on those days so obviously he wasn’t as good. 

He also talked about his family, and how they’d never been particularly well off. He had worked hard to get where he was, forgoing most opportunities at romance in order to reach his goals and make his parents proud. 

Daishou smiled at that. It wasn’t every day you saw someone who very clearly flirted with most people, talk about their own plans to not actively engage in romantic relationships until they’re stable. It was admirable really. Daishou himself definitely hadn’t done that. 

In return for all this new information, Daishou told Terushima about his parents, how they had always supported him, but were suffocating at times. He spoke of his old family cat who he missed daily, his idiot friends who had decided to go back to university instead of getting full time jobs, as well as the old lady who lived in the apartment next door. She seemed to think he was the ghost of her late husband, and Daishou was anything but rude to the old lady. 

All in all, he thought it was going well. The pessimistic part of his brain put a stop to that though. 

Terushima had just gone to pay for their meals when he started to think about how ridiculously well the date had gone. Daishou could feel himself slipping further into a giant crush on the blond, he wanted to go out with him more, wanted to do stupid things with him. He wanted to keep Terushima in his life forever. 

“You really weren't kidding when you said it was expensive here!” Terushima said, grinning. “Now allow me to walk you home. As a gentleman would.” 

Daishou wished he could muster up the energy to smile as he stood from his chair, ignoring the hand dramatically placed in front of him. 

He heard Terushima following him out of the restaurant, and could feel his own heart breaking. It would be better this way though. If he didn’t give Terushima the chance to hurt him, maybe he could survive losing him. 

“Hey,” Terushima’s voice came from behind him. “Hey. Daishou. Daishou.” 

He called his name until he turned refusing to look the blond in the eye. He stared at their feet, aware that rain was beginning to pour on their heads, much like the previous night had on himself. 

“Daishou,” Terushima’s band found his chin, guiding his gaze up until they were looking at each other. “Daishou, I don’t know what set you off just now, but I’m sorry if it was something I said or did. I had a really great time with you tonight, and I thought you did too. If you didn’t have fun, please tell me. I don’t want to chase you if you don’t want me to.” 

Daishou’s heart hammered in his chest. He felt his emotions bubbling up until he was scrunching his nose and letting his forehead drop to rest on the blond’s shoulder. His breath came fast, and the rain was soaking their clothes, but he couldn’t bring himself to voice all that he wanted to. 

He wanted to tell Terushima, wanted to make sure he knew that it wasn’t him that was the problem. He wanted to come out and just say it, but the idea of losing the blond so soon after they’d met hurt too much. 

“Oh Daishou,” Terushima said, bringing his arms up to wrap around his shoulders. “Tell me what’s on your mind. You’ll feel better, I promise.” 

Daishou stayed silent for a minute before sighing a deep breath and turning so that he could be heard. 

“I don’t want you to leave me like everyone else did,” he mumbled. 

“Now why would I do that?” 

Another shaky breath. 

“Everyone leaves eventually. I’m asexual. Nobody wants to stay with someone who won’t have sex with them.” 

He felt Terushima tense.  _ This is it. This is the moment I lose him.  _

“They’re all idiots.” 

There it was. Now Terushima would walk straight back out- wait. 

Daishou pulled back to look Terushima in the eye. The brown eyes he’d dreamt of since he first saw them held nothing but fury. 

“Do you know what the very first thing I thought when I saw you was? I need this man in my life. You were soaked through, looked like you were stressed out of your mind, and yet I still thought you were the most beautiful man I’ve ever laid eyes on. Tonight, you were talking so freely about the people you love, yes I know you won’t admit that but you do, and you know what I wished? I wished it was me you were talking about with love like that.” 

Terushima paused, his eyes searching for something in Daishou’s own, though what he was looking for Daishou had no clue. He felt like a toddler getting scolded. Did Terushima really think that about him? 

He was about to ask when Terushima continued. 

“I don’t care if I never get to have sex with you. I don’t. The only thing I want is for you to be in my life, and maybe be in it forever. I would never want to make you uncomfortable, and if any romantic contact were to do that then I wouldn’t force you to do any of it. We only have to do what we’re both comfortable with. If anyone ever made you feel otherwise, then I’m sorry. I won’t do that though, okay? I just want you to be happy.” 

Daishou’s heart thumped in his chest again. He hadn’t expected any of that. No one had ever stuck around long enough to even attempt to understand, much less tell him that it was okay. 

He was at a loss for words. So he did something very much unlike him.

He wrapped his arms around Terushima’s waist and squeezed. 

“Thank you.” 

He felt Terushima’s arms come to wrap around him again. 

“You shouldn’t have to thank me.” 

Daishou squeezed once more before pulling away and holding out a hand. 

“Come on, if you’re going to walk me home then you need to know the way,” he said. 

His hair stuck to his face, and a glance at Terushima told him that the blond had hair plastered to his scalp from the rain. They both surely looked like drowned rats, and yet, Daishou felt warmer than he ever had before. This man had accepted him so quickly, not a question about whether or not he just wasn’t into him, had just accepted that sex wasn’t an option with him. It was new, and Daishou knew that his fondness of the blond had grown immediately.

As they came to a stop outside of his apartment building he turned to face Terushima again. 

“So this is me,” he said lamely. 

“It’s nice.” 

Daishou laughed.  _ Now or never,  _ he thought. 

“It is. I had a really good time tonight you know.” 

“Enough to do it again?” The blond asked with a grin. 

“Definitely enough to do it again. And maybe a couple more times after that. Maybe.” 

Terushima’s quiet huff of a laugh, followed by the roll of his eyes before he pulled Daishou in for a hug was unbearably attractive if Daishou did say so himself. But he supposed that if he got to see it again, maybe it was okay. 

“Next week? You can even pick what we do this time,” Terushima said. 

“I’ll text you,” Daishou returned, pulling out of the embrace. “Right now I think I need a towel and you need to get home before you get sick.” 

“Aw you do care.” 

Daishou rolled his eyes before turning to the door.

“Wait,” Terushima’s voice came, footsteps closing the distance between them. “I almost forgot.” 

Daishou was about to ask what he could possibly have forgotten, but was rendered incapable or doing so when he felt soft lips fall on his own. It was quick, and a bit hard, but Daishou didn’t mind. His heart felt like it might beat out of his chest at any moment. 

“Goodnight!” Terushima said when he pulled away, darting back out into the rain. 

Daishou watched him walk away down the street, pink tinting his cheekbones. He had a good feeling about Terushima. He didn’t know if they’d last forever, or even if they’d even pass dating, but maybe, just maybe, they could fight their way through all the challenges thrown at them. 

And that was all that Daishou ever hoped for. 

**Author's Note:**

> Hey hey hey!  
> I know, I know. It’s been forever and a day since I showed my face here. But here I am with my offering in return for those shiny comments and kudos. Let me know if you like this fic! If you do, maybe there’ll be a second part? Who knows? Not me!  
> Also a huge thank you to Lex (ThatLowkeyHipster) for beta-ing this fic for me!!


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